Photo by Isaac Holmgren on Unsplash
How are you all doing? This pandemic has me on a rollercoaster of emotions. I’ve experienced both highs and lows but I’ve learned so much about myself these past few months. I’m sure that many of you reading this may be going through the same mixed bag of emotions. It’s definitely ok to not feel 100% yourself, these are very strange times we’re living in.
My appointments with my psychiatrists have been put on hold since April. Luckily, I’m still able to get my meds but I want to switch my medication because they aren’t as effective as they once were. Unfortunately, I’m unable to switch meds until my appointments are back on, whenever that is. I know quite a few of you have struggled with getting meds and I’m so sorry you have to go through this.
Learning more about ADHD
Although I feel like I’m on house arrest during this lockdown period, I’ve been afforded time and space to learn more about ADHD and my ADHD traits.
I’ve learned that my procrastination stems from experiencing an overwhelming sense of paralysis before I make a start on a task. Understanding this has helped me to learn how to address procrastination and how to approach tasks. Whenever I experience this sense of paralysis, I out loud to myself: “You’ve got this, You can do this, You was made for this!” It may sound a bit cheesy but my mind is somehow convinced by these words most of the time. Have a think of the words you could say to yourself to help you accomplish a task, try it!
Rumination, I struggle with this a lot. Rumination is focusing on the same thoughts and struggling to shift away from it. It’s quite common for those of us with ADHD to ruminate in our thoughts and feelings. ADHD’ers on twitter have thrown a couple of useful suggestions my way to help cope with ruminating, like, switching up my environment by going into a different room or going for a walk. I’m still working on this and I must admit that it’s a daily struggle.
Timeblindess. I sent this tweet out the other day:
This feels like something that is completely out of my control - send help!
But guess what!? I do have a small win to celebrate! I started this newsletter during the lockdown period and I’ve been fortunate enough to connect with so many of you.
People have asked me whether I’m ok or not, I’ve told them that I’m totally fine and things are going well, a bald-faced lie (sorry). There are days where I feel pretty lonely and unsure of what to do or how to feel. I find it hard opening up and communicating how I feel so I give them the boilerplate answer of “I’m fine”. For those of you who are feeling like this, I don’t know what you’re going through, but I’m always reminded of this quote by John Green:
There is hope, even when your brain tells you there isn't.
I’m a little bit anxious about leaving the lockdown period and going back into society. But, I’m also optimistic because I have some tools that I’ll be able to apply when I integrate back into society.
I’m a firm believer that there are better days ahead.